{"title":"Bollocks Books","description":null,"products":[{"product_id":"parenting-bollocks-funny-gift-for-new-parents","title":"Parenting Bollocks – Funny Gift for New Parents","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003eThe parenting book that says the quiet part out loud.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eA field manual for parents who appreciate the ridiculous side of raising children.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003cspan\u003eParenting Bollocks\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cspan\u003e is a funny, sharply observed guide to the chaos of modern parenthood — covering sleep deprivation, tantrums, soft play, school WhatsApp groups, family holidays, unsolicited advice and all the tiny daily disasters that somehow become completely normal.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003ePacked with incident reports, flowcharts, licences, risk assessments, checklists and official-looking forms, it turns painfully familiar parenting moments into something you can actually laugh at.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eInside you’ll find everything from toddler negotiations and competitive parents to screen-time guilt, birthday parties, leaving the house and the strange administrative burden of keeping a small human broadly operational.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eIt’s made for people who like their humour dry, irreverent and a little bit inappropriate — the kind of gift that gets opened, flicked through, laughed at and immediately passed around the room.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003ePerfect for:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cspan\u003enew mums and dads\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cspan\u003efirst-time parents\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cspan\u003ebaby showers\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cspan\u003enew-parent gifts\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cspan\u003ebirthdays\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cspan\u003eexhausted parents\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cspan\u003emates who will appreciate something a bit less wholesome\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eProduct details\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003eA5 format\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003eBlack wiro-bound\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003eFull-colour illustrated pages\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003eDesigned and published by \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThe Kelly Machine\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eA funny, original gift for parents who have already received enough muslins.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"My Store","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":58492896346443,"sku":null,"price":14.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1085\/0202\/4523\/files\/ParentingBollocks-NewParentBookFunnyGift.png?v=1789585674"},{"product_id":"old-wives-bollocks-funny-myth-busting-gift-book","title":"Old Wives’ Bollocks – Funny Myth-Busting Gift Book","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" class=\"PDq2pG_selectionAnchorContainer\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e“Don’t crack your knuckles.”\u003cbr\u003e“Carrots help you see in the dark.”\u003cbr\u003e“Going out with wet hair gives you a cold.”\u003cbr\u003e“Swallowed chewing gum stays inside you for seven years.”\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan class=\"PDq2pG_selectionAnchor\"\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\"\u003eYou’ve probably heard dozens of them.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\"\u003e\u003cem\u003eOld Wives’ Bollocks\u003c\/em\u003e is a funny illustrated field guide to the things everyone swears are true — from health myths and household remedies to food, bodies, babies, weather and the strange little rules humanity keeps handing down with absolute confidence.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\"\u003eEach myth gets investigated, explained and given a verdict:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eTRUE\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eAnnoyingly, they were right.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eMOSTLY TRUE\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eBasically right. Details got mangled.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSORT OF\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eA grain of truth wearing a massive hat.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBOLLOCKS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eNo.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWEIRDLY TRUE\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eSounds ridiculous. Isn’t.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\"\u003eThe facts stay factual. The humour comes from the way we’ve all managed to turn tiny scraps of observation into permanent family law. The book is designed to feel like an old household reference manual that has been repeatedly corrected, annotated and vandalised by somebody who has finally had enough.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" class=\"PDq2pG_selectionAnchorContainer\"\u003eInside you’ll find absurd diagrams, evidence exhibits, vintage-style adverts, scientific charts, museum specimens and other visual nonsense built around familiar myths and bizarre bits of received wisdom. \u003cspan class=\"contents\"\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan class=\"PDq2pG_selectionAnchor\"\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\"\u003ePerfect for people who love weird facts, pub trivia, myth-busting, science, family sayings and discovering that Grandma was occasionally — deeply irritatingly — right.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3 dir=\"auto\"\u003eA great gift for\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eChristmas\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ebirthdays\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSecret Santa\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003emums and dads\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003egrandparents\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003etrivia lovers\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003escience nerds\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003epeople who say “apparently…” a lot\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eanyone who has ever been told something with absolutely no supporting evidence\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003ch3 dir=\"auto\"\u003eProduct details\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\"\u003eA5 format\u003cbr\u003eBlack wiro-bound\u003cbr\u003eFull-colour illustrated pages\u003cbr\u003eFunny, factual and heavily visual\u003cbr\u003eDesigned and published by \u003cstrong\u003eThe Kelly Machine\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"The Kelly Machine","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":58493078602059,"sku":null,"price":16.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1085\/0202\/4523\/files\/OldWives_BollocksFieldManual-MythBustingGiftBook.png?v=1789588443"}],"url":"https:\/\/thekellymachine.co.uk\/collections\/bollocks-books.oembed","provider":"The Kelly Machine","version":"1.0","type":"link"}